NARUTO: A Ninjas Most Privite Thoughts
by HippieChickSOFreeky
Summary: A very very very funny storie about something Kakashi did to some students and called it a test.........check my title for clues! i suck at summaries!......[shika tem] [sas Sak][ten nen][nar hin]
1. forbidin teachers lounge!

**BY: Blizzie- chan**

**IN ASSOCIATION WITH: the author of Dream Machine**

**DEDICATED TO: Random- chan, blank-chan, kitty-chan, and NOT! Chibi-chan!**

**NARUTO: A Ninjas Most Private Thoughts **

HELLO EVERYBODY!...Kakashi said messing with the intercom... I NEED ALL NINJAS TO REPORT TO THE TEACHERS LOUNGE!

ALL NINJAS: WWWHHHHHAAAAAATTTTTTTT?

NO IM NOT KIDDING! I NEED ALL NINJAS TO THE TEACHERS LOUNGE!...THAT WILL BE ALL...

Sasuke: I wonder what that perverted teacher is up to...

Naruto: I hope this wont take long! I have a date with some ramen!

Sakura: I think you can wait a little while longer before you eat more ramen! Sigh...

Naruto: What do you mean eat?

Sasuke and sakura both give him blank an scared looks...

Sasuke: what ...else would you do with it?...

Naruto: ...well we don't want to be late! (runs off)

Sakura: And he call's Kakashi perverted...

Sasuke: Well I think Kakashi taught him every thing he knows...

Sasuke and sakura are the only ones that are standing in the hall, everyone else is rushing around them to get to the forbidden teachers lounge...

Chouji is in his giant ball form storming down the hallway... he knocks Sasuke right into Sakura causing them to...dun du...du! to KISS! now they are standing in the hall lip locked in frozen shock and horror! Luckily everyone was going so fast they didn't even notice!

In the now crowded teachers lounge...

Everyone quite, Quite, QQQQQQUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTEEEEEEEEEE!

Everyone is silent...

THANK YOU...(Gai) now..I know you are all curios to no why were all here but we will explain all of that later...for now everyone follow me and Kakashi.

Kakashi presses a MAGICAL! Button and a SUPER secrete door pops up... everyone follows them through a maze of cris crosses and ups and downs until they reach a small round room with doors all around. By know everyone who was smart enough to follow them without getting lost is there...

Temari, Sasuke, Sakura, Hinita, Shikamaru, Ino, Kiba, Ten Ten, Nenji, rock lee, and...!**NARUTO!** —what the f?... Don't ask... even Gai has become lost in the maze..

Kakashi: so now that everyone is here lets begin...

Naruto: Kakashi! Almost everyone went missing?

Kakashi: Oh...well ya...that happens alot...sigh...I'll go find them later...even Gai is gone!...

Kakashi: anyway! you are all here to take a test!

Everyone: AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Kakashi: not that kind of test! jezz! Everyone just go into one of those doors!

Everyone takes their own door and go's in...the door shuts suddenly behind them...

Kakashi to everyone on the intercom: OK EVERYBODY! THIS IS A TEST I CANT TELL YOU ABOUT OR IT WILL SPOIL IT!

NARUTO: oh please?

KAKASHI: no

Naruto: preety please?

Kakashi: no!

Naruto: with a cherry on top?

Kakashi: Noooooooooooooooo!

Kakashi: the rules are that if you move, talk, or mess with anything you will be expelled! Got it? All you can do is sit in that chair!

(Everyone looks at their chair in there room and goes and sits on it)

and hour of dulls vill! blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah!...Ok!

Kakashi: ok everyone you can move now! its over!

Many people walk out to the main room silent in anger, still day dreaming, or just mumbling curse words under their breath.

Kakashi: That was fun wasn't it?...don't answer that...anyway..(was cut off)

Naruto: I ACED IT! I DIDN'T TALK AT ALL! YOU ALL ARE JUST JEALOUS OF MY MADE SKILL!

Everyone: What skill?

Naruto: ...THE SKILL THAT YOU DON'T HAVE!

Turns into a large argument on wether Naruto has skill or not and Kakashi has just given up... trying to tell them the BIG news!

Well sorry but cliffhanger! it might be longer next chappie but trust me you will want to see what happens next on the mysterious test! look at my title for clues! R&R!


	2. come come paridise influence!

**NARUTO: A Ninjas Most Private Thoughts**

**chapter 2!**

Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...arguing on whether Naruto has skill or not!

Naruto: YES! I! DO!

Everyone: NO YOU DON'T!

Naruto: YES I DO!

Everyone: NO YOU DON'T!

Naruto: YES I DO

(STOPPING THE TELLING YOU WHO IT IS THING ITS OBVIOUS!)

NO YOU DON'T

YES I DO

NO YOU DON'T

YES I DO

NO YOU DON'T

YES I DO

NO YOU DON'T

YES I DO

NO YOU DON'T!

YA HU

NU U

YA HU

NU U

Kakashi: WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP! I cant even read in these circumstances! (Holding come come paradise in his hands)

Naruto: Kakashi? Do I have skill?

Kakashi: no

Naruto: but Kakashi!

Everyone: NO!

Sasuke: Please just tell us what that stupid test was for!

Sakura: and please tell us Naruto failed and is going to be expelled!

Naruto: don't worry baby! Even if were at different schools I will still come and visit you!

Sakura: SHUT UP!

Ino: don't worry now that you two are a couple I will keep Sasuke company!

Sasuke: O NO YOU WONT!

Sakura: Besides you have Hinita Naruto!

Hinita: What?

Naruto: (blushes puts arm around Hinita) Sorry Sakura it would have never of worked out between us darling! ( fake sobs)

Sakura: WORK OUT WHAT?

Ino: fine! Where's Shikamaru?

Shikamaru: Huh what?

Ino: Heeeeeeeelllllllloooooooo bbbbbaaaaaabbbbbbbbyyyyyyyyy!(Hugs Shikamaru try's to kiss him!)

Shikamaru: WHAT THE HECK? GET OFF ME WOMEN!

Ten Ten: o give it up Ino-pig! Shikamaru has already fell for Temari!

Temari: (blushes) uh...

Shikamaru: exactly!

Ino: WHAT? Really? No! I don't believe you...your lying!

Sakura: Why would he lie?

Shikamaru: ya lying's to troublesome!

Sasuke: jezz, can she ever learn!

Rock lee: DON'T WORRY INO! IM HEAR FOR YOU NO ONE LIKES ME ANYWAY!

Ino: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Ino: Prove that you love Temari Nara shikamaru!

Shikamaru: prove it?

Ten ten: and how is he supposed to do that!

Shikamaru; im not stupid I know what she wants me to do!

Ten Ten: what?

Ino: so do it then! Or are you hesitating!

Shikamaru: Why would I hesitate?

Temari: I don't know if I like where this is going!

Shikamaru grabs Temari and kisses her smack on the lips in front of everyone!

Kakashi: Dang! Has he been reading my book and not telling me! (under his breath)

Temari is left in a daze and Shikamaru just smirks at Ino!

Ino looks at Sasuke and Sakura, Sasuke dose not need her to say anything he grabs sakura and kisses her the same way!

Ino starts to cry! No one seems to care...

Rock Lee: Ino why are you crying? I will kiss you!

Ino: What did you say? But it was to late! Rock lee kissed her!

( Ino realizes that she likes Rock Lee more then she thought! Everyone leaves them ALONE!)

Ten Ten: well that's that! (Feeling very proud of herself!)

Hinita: not so fast Ten Ten, shikamaru will you please do the honors?

Shikamaru: my pleasure!

Shikamaru puts nenji under the Shadow thingy, he walks over to temari and kisses her! Makeing Nenji kiss Ten Ten!

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Kakashi: ok...now that everyone has gotten to know each other better lets get back to business!

Sasuke: finally!

Kakashi: Wait! That little love spree has brought up a very good point!

Sasuke: groan...

Kakashi: For Christmas you are all getting copies of Come Come Paradise!

Everyone's sweat drops...

Kakashi: now for the test...I RECORDED YOUR THOUGHTS!

Everyone: WHAT?

Kakashi: Ya? Isin't it great? I am a genius! Now I will have everyones thoughts in the palm of my hand! MMMMUUUUUHHHHAAAAAHHHHAAAAHHHHHAAAMMMUUUUHHHHAAAA

Kakashi: Now if you will follow me into the theater room to watch them all!

Sasuke: now wait just a minute!

Ino: thoughts are supposed to be private!

Sakura: what if we didn't think?

Kakashi: I put you in a little room with nothing to do you must have been day dreaming!

Everyone starts yelling at Kakashi mad and confused?...

**Well I hope you liked it! Took awhile but it was very fun to write! I konw I am putting off the thoughts but we will at least start by next chappie!** I know I did not have Kiba talk but there is no love triangle that I like with Kiba! So live with it! K...R&R!


	3. SUPER NARUTO! and giant chilly dogs!

**NARUTO: A Ninjas Most Private Thoughts**

**chapter 3!**

After the commotion had died down a bit they all took their seats in the small room. Kiba with a worried face and Akumaru hiding in his shirt finally said something.

Kiba: God Kakashi why did you half to do this?

Kakashi: I had to try it out on someone, and you were the only people I could fool into doing it! Thank you, you idiots!

(Sasuke starts straggling Kakashi!)

Kakashi: uncle uncle!

Ino sat with Rock Lee, Shikamaru with Temari, Sasuke with Sakura, Naruto with Hinita, and Ten Ten with Nenji. Naruto, Hinita, Sasuke, Sakura were on the couch. Ten Ten, Nenji behind the couch. Rock Lee and Ino towards the exit, and Shikamaru and Temari right up front! ( Kiba was in the corner)

Kakashi: Is everyone ready?

(people mumbling under there breath, Ten Ten yells BRING IT ON! Some people look at her with blank faces...

Kakashi: OK!

Screen: 3,2,1 Kakashi growls like the lion... "From Kakashi Productions!" "By Kakashi!" "For Kakashi!" A NINJAS MOST PRIVATE THOUGHTS!

Kakashi: I love that part!

People grown...sweat drops...

NARUTO'S THOUGHTS! Flashes on the screen...

Naruto's thoughts!

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

it is night...closes in on a large building...(inside) Naruto is dancing way beter then he dose in real life... all girls are googly eyed over him...

Song: GO GO DISCO INFERNO! LET ME SEE YOU MOVE LIKE YOUR GO'IN FORCO LOCO!...BLAH BLAH BLAH...

Thought naruto: yes! I have finally mastered dancing! Now tell me what do I half to master next?

Thought Sakura: nothing! You have mastered everything you are so amazing! I love you!

Thought girls: YES YES! WE LOVE YOU TO NARUTO-KUN!

Thought Naruto: yes yes I know! But Sakura darling! I am sorry but I don't love you anymore nor ever!

Thought sakura: WHAT! SOBBING...

REAL Sakura: strangling Naruto...

Thought Naruto: The one I love is! Hinita!

Thought Hinita: What? I am so happy! The best ninja in the history of the universe loves me!(tears of joy!)

Thought Sasuke: don't worry girls I still love you! I mean im will never be as good as Naruto but I am still great right?

All thought girls: No Way!

He's so weird!

He's ugly!

Ewwwwwwwww!

Your right your never as good as Naruto!

Gross!

Thought Sasuke; but I think your prety!

Thought girls again:

You perv!

He's gay!

No he's lesbian!

Thought Naruto: Silence! That is enough! Now I shall speak! Sasuke! How dare you even use your name in the same sentence as mine! You have disobeyed me!

Thought Sasuke: im sorry im sorry!

Thought Naruto: now you interrupt me? Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! You shall work a hundred years of labor! you shall listen to me always or be punished!

Thought Sasuke: that's it! You can not control me!

Thought Naruto: FINE! This will be punishment number one! He changes Sasuke into a female maid outfit!

Thought Naruto: Now! Get my room ready for me and Hinita! WITH FRESH RAMEN AND MOISTENED TOILETS!

REAL Sasuke: strangling Naruto

Thought Sakura: Lord Naruto I know your great! But...how great?

Thought Naruto: I will show you unwanted girl...suddenly gets wings and a hallow...flies into the air!

Thought Naruto: I am bigger then Jesus!

Thought Everyone: woooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwww!

Suddenly the screen goes fuzzy...

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kakashi pauses it before it goes into the next thought

Kakashi: Bigger then Jesus?

Naruto: well...um...sure lets go with that!

Sakura: unwanted girl!1?

Sasuke: yes master?

Hinita: love?

Shikamaru, Temari, rock lee, ino, kiba, ten ten, nenji are all laughing!

Kakashi: quite! Quite!

Everyone (except Naruto): We want out!

Stop it!

Show it and your dead!

Kakashi: Shut up! (locks the doors for people trying to escape) If you don't stop I will make you all watch sex ed. Videos!

Everyone shuts up un willingly...

Kakashi: how bought one more before intermission?...don't answer that!.

**Kiba's thoughts!**

(Kiba standing on the screen)

thought narrator: IN A WORLD FILLED WITH EVIL CHILLY DOGS! ONE NINJA IS HEAR TO FACE THEM ALL! ( kiba jumps up dose some weird ninja moves)

thought Kiba: CHILLY DOGS BEWARE MY EATING FURRY!

Chilly dogs fly on to the screen...Kiba fights them...the giant chilly dogs looking very weird when they fight!

Thought giant chilly dog: BEWARE MY STEAMING CHILLY GOODNESS! MUHA HA HA MU HA HA HA MU HA HA HA HA HA HA HA SHOOTS CHILLY AT KIBA

when it reaches him Kiba eats the chilly...

Thought chilly dog: OH NO! THE PRECIOUS CHILLY! IT IS INSIDE HIM! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

KIBA runs after them and while doing some awesome ninja moves he eats them all bite by bite!

Thought Kiba: ahh.! my work here... is done! huy ya!

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

everyone has blank faces at Kiba... Kibas face is very red!

Sasuke: what the hell were you thinking?

Temari: We know very well what he was thinking we just watched it!

Sasuke: I know that but! But! BUT!

Sakura: (hits sasuke on the head) Sasuke stop thinking about but's! It's perverted!

Kiba: I was really hungry! Ok!

Everyone notices that he has been cowing down on the complementary popcorn!

Rock Lee: b,b,big chhh,illy d,d,dogs! BIG CHILLY DOGS! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! THEY WILL RULE THE WORLD! Runs to the door forgets its locked and hard metal and slams into it!

Kakashi: ok?...How bought a intermission! I have one already made up on the screen and everything!

**Hey every body! I hope you liked it! I will write more soon but school is over in a week so try to be patient! I hope it wasn't to weird?...I for one loved it! much more to come!**

R&R!


	4. INTERMISSION

**Intermission!**

**(not really a chapter)**

**Thank you to the creators of al these videos that I found on the internet!**

**Your help was greatly appreciated!**

**Very!**

**Don't hate me that this is very short looking!**

**But please watch the videos that I found!**

**You will love them!**

**Promise!**

**Ok?**

**Ready?**

**GO!**

**Intermission! **

Screen: 3, 2, 1! INTERMISSION! Called...: NARUTO TALENT SHOW & WEIRD STUFF!

REAL NINJAS!(Gai, Gaara, snake dude, other people!)

G o too **you tube . com **in on search: Real Ninjas Naruto!

Everybody was kung fu fughting!

Go too **you tube . com **in on search: everybody was kung fu fighting Naruto

Happy song!

Go to **you tube . com **search: Narutos happy song

Im to sexy!

Go to **you tube . com **I'm to sexy Naruto or Naruto I'm to sexy!

Naruto Ninja of the night

go to **you tube . com **Naruto ninja of the night

**cant touch me **

**go to** you tube . com **cant touch me Naruto!**

**Hope you like them I sure do they are awesome! Please take the time to see them Kakashi worked hard on them!... when you go to you tube dont space ( i had to do that or they would not have let me write it down!) **


	5. ruber duckies and x rated!

**NARUTO: A Ninjas Most Private Thoughts**

**chapter: 5**

Sasuke: Well...that was an interesting intermission..

Sakura: Interesting? That was just weird!

Shikamaru: I did not know Gai was so open about no underwear!

Temari: Ninja of the night was hilarious!

Rock Lee: Sand Man?

Kakashi: THANK YOU! THANK YOU! VERY VERY VERY MUCH! IM GLAD YOU ALL LOVED IT!

Everyone: mumbling under breath...

Kakashi: Well anyway it is time for our next thought.!

Lets see... it looks like this will be shikamaru!

**Shikamaru's thought**!

On screen.: one cloud passes...than another...then another...and another...one looks like a cookie...another looks like a duck...and a chilly dog?

off screen: Kiba and Rock Lee go crazy!

On screen: more clouds pass for 5 minutes than one starts to look like a person...it gets more features...it is a girl...pigtail's...a big fan on her back...its Temari!

Shikamaru blushes off screen..Temari stares..

The cloud gets closer and closer...it seems to be getting bigger...getting color...

Thought Temari cloud: shikamaru snap out of it!

Thought Shika: Screams!11

Real Shikamaru: screams!

Real other people: scream with laughter!

Now back to thought...

Thought shikamaru: oh my god! It is real Temari!

Thought Temari: no duh genus! I was standing here for 10 minutes wondering when you would realize I was here and stop staring at me!

Thought Shikamaru's well...thought: I wish the cloud that looks like a cookie was real!

Thought temari: jezz! I am going to get you a cookie to calm down.

Real Temari: huh?

Thought Temari: turns around and reaches into her bag...

Thought: close up on Temaris butt...

Real Temari: hits Shika on the back of the head!

Thought: When Temari turns around she is different...she is dressed in a geisha outfit and Shikamaru is in one of though's Moroccan rooms that looks like a tent with pillows every where..

Thought Temari is carrying a plat of chocolate chip cookies.

Thought Temari sits next to Shikamaru and starts feeding him cookies! All the while shikamaru is feeling her butt!

Real Temari: Killing shikamaru!

Real Ino: crying! with some giggles..

Thought: Ino comes in, in a suit ..

Thought Ino: Is there anything I can do for you?

Thought Shikamaru: get my room ready, fluff the pillows, put some rose pettles every where, get a bottle of champagne, and get your self a haircut! Jezz! You look like a damn hippy!

Thought Ino: yes sir..

Thought ends.

Everyone has blank faces.. Even Temari has stopped killing Shikamaru to watch the screen..

Ino's eyes are flaring with anger!

Ino: HIPPY!

Shikamaru: Oh come on! Don't take it personally!

Temari: cant say a word.. She is shocked by the whole get my room ready thing..

Shikamaru is blushing like mad...!

Kakashi: HA HA HA! You got to admit Ino.. You really should stop neglecting your hair! And Shikamaru...stop watching porn!

Shikamaru: WHAT! BUT I! I DIDN'T! WHAT DID I?

Ino: NEGLECTING!

Temari: oh just shut up Ino pig!

**Sasuke's** **thought!**

Everything is under water...with bubbles...like a bubble bath...suddenly lots and lots of rubber duckys appear...everyone with there own characteristic...

Sakura duck has pink hair

Kiba Duck has a big crazy fluffy hair..

Naruto duck has big blond hair..

Shikamaru duck has a pony tail..

Temari duck has blond pig tails

Ten Ten duck has buns

Hinita duck has blue hair..

Neji duck has long hair..

Rock Lee duck has a cocoanut haircut hair

Ino duck has "hippy" long blond hair

then out off no where, a table, chairs, and a tea set appears...

...THERE HAVING ATEA PARTY! THE WATER IS PINK! WITH A BACKGROUND STRAIT OUT OF SPONGBOB SQUAREPANTS! naruto is picking on the girl ducks trying to enjoy there tea. Suddenly some duck pairings start to kiss! Example...: Ten Ten duck and Neji duck, shikamaru duck and Temari duck, Naruto duck and Hinita duck, Ino duck and Rock Lee duck! And they start to make out! (trust me it is weird to see rubber duckies make out!)

Suddenly spongbob jumps out with a flame thrower and threatens to kill the duckies if they don't reales Sakura duck to him! They have no choice! They give him Sakura duck! Now spongbob trys to make a move on sakura duck! Suddenly! Sasuke duck fly's in and rescue's Sakura duck! Sasuke duck besides his blue hair...has a red cape on and ducky underwear? They all live happily ever after as ducks! After Sasuke kills everyone in bikini bottom..(spongbobs town)...

Thought ends!

Sasuke is going crazy with embarrassment! Kakashi is rolling on the ground laughing histaracly! Everyone else is either laughing like mad! Or are to shocked for words!

Kakashi: rubber duckies!

Sasuke: I was um...only thinking that because instead of just killing them..um...I was wondering what it would be like to save them...um... you know..in a battle..you what to know what your opponits...were..um...thinking...so...um...

Kakashi: so let me get this strait!...you were "studding" in case of a rubber duckie attack?

Sasuke: Well you always want to be prepared! You never know when it might happen!...(obviously he made that entire excuse up!)

Kakashi: Well...ok ...here is another thought...Temari's!

Temari's Thought!

Temari hade just finished killing Naruto...well at least ripping him to shreds...

Thought Shikamaru: well that is almost the last of them!

Thought Temari: almost? Who have we forgotten love button?

Thought Shikamaru: INO-PIG!

Thought Temari: oh right!

They both proceed in killing Ino together!

Real shikamaru: shocked

Real Kakashi: love button! Holding back laughter..

They walk back into what appears to be a castle together!

Thought shikamaru: oh Temari boo! Is there anything you cant do? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

Thought temari: oh I know! I LOVE YOU TO! You sexy beast!

Thought shikamaru: oooooo grrrr! Ha ha ha

thought temari: I am so sure! What is with the grr? Hahaha

thought shikamaru: oh I think you know why!

Thought temari: oh I do! Hahahaha you are so naughty!

Thought shikamaru: oh come on you are the one that figured it out without me telling you! Naughty!

Thought temari: your right I am naughty!

Thought shikamaru hits temaris butt!

Thought temari: what as that for?

Thought shikamaru: your punishment!

Thought temari; ohh! I get it! Hehahaha

thought shikamaru: kisses Temari..

Suddenly they are in a bedroom!

Thought temari: hahahahaha stop it! Hahaha

Thought Shikamaru: kissing temari all over!

Kakashi turns it off!

Kakashi: well um...that was getting a little x rated so I will just fast forward to the next one...

Everyone: blank faces! They expected her killing people...but not that!

Temari is blushing like mad and wished that Kakashi had not locked the doors.. And was very close to killing him for the remote that locked them! Shikamaru was blushing to! Especially after Sasuke pushed Him into Temari! Silence...

**I can not believe I just wrote that!** **but I had to! So don't kill me!** **More thoughts to come! Try to ignore any typos sorry! Hope you liked it! Realy random ideas! Thank you to that one person that helped me with the rubber duckies idea! R & R!**


	6. IM SORRY PEOPLE ANNONCMENT

Hey sorry of this bums anyone out but its good news! I just got on to Christmas break yesterday so I got a lot of free time on my hands...unless I go to my friends house or something more fun...well anyways im sorry because if u noticed , well I have been writing on my page that I will write this weekend or so and so and whatever and im sorry that I Haven't been I just started a new school this year and I've got algebra homework! Lol but I haven't committed to doing it so sry sry sry but I promise I will update as much as I can over this next two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If u'd like to help the likes of me then and chappie ideas or even new story ideas please do!!!(im all for a cool new story to write!!!) I have been gorging on ideas for months now so I hope any new chappies and or stories will show it!!!! _I have a vast mind of ideas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...oOoOoOo_

THXS AGAIN AND DON'T COME AND KILL ME BECAUSE U THOUGHT THIS WAS GONA BE A CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!: )


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